Getting In Touch with my Viking Peeps

My grandma (GG) got my mom this DVD for Christmas.
Now to see what being a viking is all about...

Makeshift but still Legit

Hello phone. Oh, you have a new update? Will I hate it as much as the last update?

As many of you, I cling to what I know and fight what is new. People talk about photo shop, Indesign, phones that have a level of intelligence and I'm like whaaaa....? 

My petition to the world is that we'd be just as happy with out any of it! In fact sometimes these advances in technology add to my misery.

Any one ever master a different software program to avoid the obnoxious reaction of, "You still use that?!"  Once you've got yourself up to speed you go on boasting about it and that kid who must never sleep at night pipes in, "That program may have been cool a few hours ago, but now there's 10 better ones." Well you know what sleep deprived children? I'm over it.

My brain doesn't work in public settings very well, so I don't prefer to use campus computers with access to higher-end programs. My budget doesn't stay in the positive very well when I have to buy these programs.

In the past month I have made do with what I've got, and the results may surprise you.

1 

I used powerpoint to create graphics, and to design my public relations book. A's on both projects. 

The books on the left are from google

2

I needed to give my client digital access to their PR book. So I bought a CD from the bookstore and used shoe glue to make it stick. 

3

I'm no expert videographer. I am the videographer behind this video. Any guesses what camera? Try the iPhone. Sam's plastic dresser drawer made for an excellent tripod. Her sheets served as light filters. I just recently used my germ-ex bottle in combination with a wall as a tripod for my phone. 

I was fully captured in previous videos. This happens to be the video where I wasn't fully captured, but was fed up with practicing.  I had to send a practice video to my teacher of the above mentioned business presentation. Would you like a tripod that can move- like a dolly? 

this photo was edited on iphoto! How neat is that?!

 Please share your makeshift- but still legit techniques!

Oldies

You may think they smell. You might think they're boring. You might roll your eyes as they tell you a story you've heard countless times. Let's be real, though. Oldies are better than us young whipper snappers.

Both of my grandmothers are still alive. Their stories are priceless. One I will call GG, and the other just straight up G. They're both super gangstah. 

G loved to go dancing. Her favorite is the fox trot. At one particular dance their was a man with a big ol' hat. He asked her to dance. She wasn't digging the hat, and said no. This man moved down the line of ladies, asking each to dance. He came back to G and asked her to dance again. She stuck to her guns, and said no again. That hat was just too big.

The man said, "Lady, I'm not asking to marry you, I just want to dance." Two months later they became husband and wife. Too fast? Sure, some might think so. But she's loved that man her whole life, and doesn't go a day with out talking about how much she misses him. He passed away over a decade ago.

GG was just as tough on the men. She is from Florida, and her brothers are avid fishermen. A man was expressing some interest in her, and she planned to take care of that right away. Just as this man was about to leave on a cross country trip she gave him a gift and forbade him to open it before reaching his destination. What a lovely gesture. Yes, what a lovely,lovely thing that was for GG to give this man a delightfully decorated package of fish to take on his journey.

A man should appreciate a clear message from a woman when he gets it.

Oldies have depth. The riches of experience are theirs. Many of them have been through the toughest times in history: the great depression, World War I and World War II.

Ask them, "what is your story?" The most burdensome questions we carry can be answered by learning from the vast experience of our elders.

We Are Viking Women!!

My grandmother Grimes had a blood test done recentlythat revealed she is 67% Viking.I have no idea how this blood test thing works.Perhaps it’s the way it smells…or looks…as long as the scientists and doctors get it, it’s legit.

So, at first I was elated to have such strong heritage! 

Then I realized who the Vikings were.

Now, I’m elated because there’s no waypeople shouldn’t fear me now. No way. 

In fact, it makes complete sense.

I love my family.We are each resolute and sure in our views.

When people disagree about how something is doneone might say, “there are many ways to skin a cat.”No. No there isn’t. There is one way!It is the ONLY way, and it is the best way.

I’ll be honest,it’s an attitude I’ve been trying to overcome for quite some time.Feel free to question me but be aware and beware;I’m not just a Viking, I’m a red-headed Viking. 

Fire Alarm Frenzy

You know the fantastic noise that fire alarms make, and how you feel about the people who cause them? 

I'm sure a swear word or two were aimed in my direction 
when I caused the fire alarm to "serenade" 
my apartment complex this afternoon.

I’d like to say it went off because I’m so smokin’ hott, 

and while I totally am, that’s not the reality.

Hunger and impatience is the cause of my shameful moment. 

The most convenient/filling thing I could find 
to eat was a can of pork and beans. 

Matt and I have a limited number of bowls 
we can put in the microwave, 

and it just so happens that they are all dirty. 

No, I still haven’t washed them. 

Don’t be too hasty in your judgments, however; 
they’re from weeks ago.
Just Kidding. They're from this morning.

Anyhow, I thought one of my pots would do just fine at

accommodating my pork and beans 
whilst they heated in the rays of the quick cooker.

If something can withstand an oven and a stove top, 

why on earth shouldn’t it successfully endure a microwave?

The problem with that question is...

ONE: I’ve actually never tried putting my pots in the oven. 

Why I found it a valid point at the time is a mystery.  

TWO: If "the something" is aluminum…

It doesn’t work as far as microwaving things goes. 

It does work as far as having a lightning storm

in the convenience of your own home!           

                                                                                                               

I gave an inspirational “ted talk” about achieving dreams today. 

I’ll take my own encouraging words:

It’s better to try, fail and learn, than it is 
to never try, and never learn.

I'm sure the deeper lessons of this experience 

will reveal themselves with more clarity in time, 

such as the importance of patience, and thoroughness of thought.

But for now my pork and beans taste like cancer. 
& I have more dishes to clean.

I Have No Clue

News Anchors are people I enjoy mocking. I auditioned to be one yesterday.
My experience went as follows:

ONE: 
I entered the studio,

 and noticed the table had built in TV's.
Furthermore, my partner and I were on the screens.

I have pondered on the purpose of this 
and have concluded that
News anchors must be more narcissistic than I thought. 


I then realized how good I looked! 

TWO: 
I fumbled around with the clip-on mic for a few minutes,

 until I settled for the least-awkward spot on my super shiny blue-button up.

THREE: 
They told me to scoot closer to my anchor friend. 

I moved too close. 

They gave me sitting at a table for dummies advice.
The trick, they said, is to line your belly button up 

with the green piece of tape. 

Alignment paranoia ensued.

FOUR: 
I had no idea what to do with my limbs. 

I'll admit I copied just about every move of my partner.

FIVE: 
When I introduced myself I think I used a phone greeting, 

"This is Melissa Co- I mean, Thurm."

(can't seem to let go of my maiden name)

SIX: 
My comrade must have sensed my total absence of focus,

 and read my story. 
No Worries, 
I read his with over the top enthusiasm.
They like that, I think.

 

SEVEN: 
My shoulders did the classic
"I'm too tense to handle this well" scrunch.
Confidence Communicated. Check! 

EIGHT: 
The moisture completely disappeared 

from my lips. 
I used my tongue to moisten them. 
Couldn't have been more professional.

NINE: 
I squinted my eyes to read.   

I have perfect vision.  
Perhaps they'll fall for it as my intellectual look...

TEN: 
The script ended. My lips were twitching from my mock, 

"I'm finished, but I'm beautiful so 

you can keep looking" face.

Needless to say, I'm a natural. 

#gotthisjobinthebag #trysomethingneweveryday!

We Found Us

There is a place in a time called before
In it was you and me
and many more

we laughed and we played and we probably cried
we wished one day
to be eternally tied

we knew we must leave "before"
to receive this blessing 
we had in store

this meant for a time we'd forget
so we made a plan 
and painted it

you and I were in the center
surrounded by 
what life would render

we took it apart and put it back together
we hoped that would prepare us
 for the separation we'd weather

you left first, I left later
we had faith
 in our creator

I began my puzzle the day I was reborn
and again at 12 
from the world I was shorn

a big piece awaited, I knew in my heart
a piece I desired 
from the start

depressed and discouraged I left my home
and traveled 
to a place called BYU-Idaho

my friend wanted to swing dance and I wanted to, too
I danced with him, and him 
and then I danced with you

after that night we've laughed, and we've played, 
and we've certainly cried

on August 15th we were eternally tied

our painting held true

you found me, 
and I found you

Media's Ploy

A beautiful baby is born today

What will that baby become someday?

For today a bundle of joy

For tomorrow subject to media’s ploy

It’s a shame

For today called a beauty

And tomorrow a floosy

What else is to be done?

It’s all just for fun.

Another beautiful baby is born

By the one spoken of before

Lacking a father

To the mother a bother

What else is to be done?

It’s all just for fun.

Beautiful babies are born every day

Their true beauty hidden away 

Dismissed, as shapeless! blemished!

Too far from the status quo!

Unaware of the beauty they hold

Their world becomes dark, bitter and cold

With this widespread dimming

The adversary is winning

With our message we must be bold

To see with new eyes we all must be told

Beauty is a baby born

Into a family untorn

Beauty is pride tucked away

And  sacrifice made

Beauty is love 

which is patient and kind

It is something with in 

that all can find